I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Randomize
