i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Randomize
