so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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