My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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