Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
