Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
