Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
