Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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