Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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