? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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