Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
