I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
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Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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