I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize