I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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