I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
We are two peas in an std pod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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