My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
