Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize