She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
i think my cat just said my name.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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