My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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