he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
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On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
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I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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