I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize