I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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