She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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