Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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