I just pynch a tree in the face
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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