just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
