when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
