Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Randomize