my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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