just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Blood and glitter go together right?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
