do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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