have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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