I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
