I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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