Do you still have your period?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
