She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
