I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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