I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
