just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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