glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
