Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Blood and glitter go together right?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize