someone get that fucking seahorse.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
