If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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