Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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