I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
