Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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