if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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