The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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