If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
