so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
