Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
