I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
