you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize
